I can presume that while almost every teacher is rushing in to give works to their students, Miss Disa is chilling and relaxing. It’s a good thing that she is teaching AEP as we wouldn’t have to rush in to everything. Right now, it’s that point of the semester in school when our schedules are piled up with assignments and projects to do as a result of the classes that have been missed due to the holidays,  celebrations, and school suspensions.

It was a Sunday night and being the procrastinator that I am, I was rushing in doing all of my assignments. In the process of doing so, a little box in my mind opened and reminded me that there was still AEP homework to be done. Oh great! Another homework, I thought. Luckily, before doing so, I checked my schedule first and it felt as is a blessing was laid down upon me (It may seem as if I’m exaggerating, but that’s how I really felt at that moment). There was no AEP on Monday.

Skip over to Monday night, and once again, I was rushing in doing all of my assignments considering the amount we had to do. I don’t exactly remember what time it was, but I do remember that as I was about to go to bed, my eyes popped open. My mind was on alert now, as I remembered I STILL HAD AEP HOMEWORK TO DO ( I guess that’s what you get for procrastinating ). At that point, I don’t think I was sleepy anymore. I went to bed in panic thinking of the amount of work I had to do the next day.

So there I was on a Tuesday morning doing my homework and studying for my Turkish quiz while everyone else was still asleep. Thankfully, I was able to finish everything just in time for my classes. AEP that day was good, nothing complicated to do and we already had our information written down as a part of our homework. However, we were announced that OUR TURKISH QUIZ WAS CANCELLED. I started complaining in my head thinking of all the sleeping time that I had missed. Generally, that day was still a great day. But what I didn’t see coming, was what we had to do the next day.

My friends and I walked into Miss Disa’s class on a Wednesday morning smiling, hoping that it would be a good day. We were all doing just fine, until Miss Disa said we had to do a graded recitation as a part of our Midterms. I was still smiling even though inside, I was slowly crying and whining.

It was time for the recitation, and I had to go first. I stood up and was finding it hard trying to get words to come out of my mouth. As a person, I have anxiety. But with the situation that we had to do, anxiety wasn’t the problem. I guess I was worrying too much about everything going on. I felt really pressured, thinking “What if I don’t get a good grade?” or “What if  I won’t be contented with myself on what I did?”. Every time a new school year starts, I just feel so pressured with everything. I could just not do my work and fail everything, but there’s always this feeling in me that I couldn’t let go if I got a low grade. I know that you can’t always be good in everything, but it wouldn’t hurt to try, would it?  Everything was jumbled in my mind at that time and my mind felt blocked.

But in the end, I didn’t do such a bad job and Miss Disa considered it just as a recitation. I guess that made my day a lot better. So I would like to say thank you to Miss Disa.  😀

Picture from: https://memegenerator.net/instance/57840362